Reflection of Providence

So, a small package came in the mail for me today. I was first afraid that someone was trying to sell me something, but with nervous anticipation I opened the package and this is what I saw (I don't think I have been so suprised, except maybe my high school graduation suprise party)... I SCREAMED! I couldn't believe she had done this. This was something we used to say when things were just stressful. I can't remember, we went to college together, if it was around midterms, finals, what...but this phrase was birthed. You could often just ask how the other was and know if they said it! It was WONDERFUL! I LOVE this shirt. I am going to wear it as often as possible. If I could wear it to work, oh how fitting it would be to, it would just be splendid. My sister said that I had wonderful friends and you know, I do. It isn't anything I've done, but it is by the grace of God that He has provided me such wonderful amazing people in my life. Erin, I have no idea how I'll...

There is a great fear residing in my heart…what if God doesn’t show up when I seek Him! I’ve put Him through it…why does He still seek me and love me? His ways are TRULY not mine. I have to quit rationalizing Him in my finite mind when He is so infinite. This VBS was probably one of the most AMAZING I’ve ever had. First, the material was sound and the backdrop was a Hawaiian theme, which I LOVED. We learned that God was real and there was no other God, Jesus is God’s Son, Jesus is the ONLY way to Heaven, the Bible is God’s Word, and our actions reflect what we believe. I had first and second graders. They were a treasure and taught me so much. In my fear I’ve been procrastinating in my journey forward. There have been enough signals in my life that have shown I need to start taking that next step, but I feel like I’m hanging on a precipice. I’m terrified…which leads to old thoughts…which leads to sin. It’s easier said than done to take the plunge. My sister gave me this awesome quote b...

No, not actual crap or snot…I’m not that gross. These are the adjectives that I use when I’m frustrated about having to do something that I know I have to do and just don’t want to do it. Back in February I signed back up to Netflix. When I worked at B&N I had had this WONDERFUL service for over a year and when I began making less and less money I soon had to drop it always intending to go back. Now, you know how much I love movies and always will I guess. However, I saw myself getting back into my old patterns of life. My old thought processes, my old escapes, my old desires, and I was rebelling against God. Oh, I was going through the motions…tithing, church, service, work. All in all on the outside I looked like a good little church going Christian. On the inside however I was crumbling. When I signed up for Netflix I had this strong feeling that God didn’t want me too, but I brushed it off and thrilled myself at the thought of this new venture. Ever since I have not had a peace...

It has been a long while since I have written just something about me on my blog, so I thought I would catch you up on what has been going on in my life. There is a lot of hope in the air and I’m anticipating greatness. The first thing is as of this Saturday I’m completely debt free. PRAISE GOD! I told God that I didn’t want to move unless I was out of debt, so the first step in the right direction. My heartbeat is still for Asheville, but I’m praying for what God wants. I’m no longer going to fight, in fact for awhile I’ve laid down and died…no more of that either. I want to live. We are to live fully until Jesus comes. I want to praise and serve while I’m waiting. I’m excited. I feel the trimmer in the air, and I’m anticipating the horizon. Whatever may come I will serve. I’m so blessed beyond measure to have people who get me and love me and support me. I know without friends, family, church family I would have long ago given up. This Sunday we had the Lord’s Supper at church. It tr...

I, Patrick, as sinner, am the most ignorant and of least account among the faithful, despised by many…It was not any grace in me, but God who is victorious in me and resisted them all, so that I came to the Irish people to preach the gospel and to bear insults from unbelievers, to hear the scandal of my travels, and to endure many persecutions even to the extent of prison; so that I surrender my liberty as a man of free condition for the profit of others, and if I should be found worthy, I am ready to give even my life for His name’s sake unfalteringly, gladly, and without hesitation; and there(in Ireland) I desire to spend it until I die, if our Lord should grant it to me. I owe it to God’s grace that so many people should through me be born again in God…But I implore those who believe in and fear God, whoever consents to examine or receive this document composed by the obviously unlearned sinner Patrick in Ireland, that no one shall ever credit to me even the smallest of things that ...

Psalm 84 For the director of music. According to gittith. Of the Sons of Korah. A psalm. [a] 1 How lovely is your dwelling place, O LORD Almighty! 2 My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the LORD; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God. 3 Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young— a place near your altar, O LORD Almighty, my King and my God. 4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house; they are ever praising you. Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. 6 As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools. 7 They go from strength to strength, till each appears before God in Zion. 8 Hear my prayer, O LORD God Almighty; listen to me, O God of Jacob. Selah 9 Look upon our shield...

I LOVE a good story... I am drawn and captivated by a simplistic truth to storytelling. I ache to see the richness of human souls displayed, be it a painting, a song, a sculpture, or all too often,…a film. Penelope is such a film. I was undone by the simplistic beauty of this film. This is what a fairytale is meant to be, this is what a folktale is meant to evoke, a place where all hop-toads are prince charming and all chamber maids are princesses. The perception of physical beauty is never found without, but within. The character of a human being can be changed by seeing belief in another person’s eyes. You are always more capable of being so much more than what most believe you possess, even yourself. However, this movie is far from self-love. It is more about self-confidence and being the creation, while God is not mentioned, that you were intended to be. Why wallow with the pigs when you were meant to dine with the King. This film is short, tender, and precious. A movie that Mothe...