Reflection of Providence

So, I say that it is about surrender or the “art of surrender”, but I’m struggling to know how to do that, what it really means to surrender my all to God… I think first we have to know the character of God. My pastor has been talking a lot about God’s justice. It is nice to be familiar with God, but do we sacrifice reverent fear for comfortable familiarity. God really isn’t “my bro”, “the big man in the sky”; “my homeboy”…to say these things is to cheapen the very essence of who the Divine is. He is holy, set apart, other! It is great to liken Him to your husband, which is the status I find most familiar with myself. However, HE is also the Lord Almighty, Loving King, Gracious Father, Prince of Peace, Lamb of Judah, Rock of Jesse…all powerful, all knowing, all in all…I AM! He is the same God from Old to New. We cannot embrace the God of the New Testament dismissing the Old as irrelevant. Jesus is God! I think we have lost sight of God’s justice, Sovereignty, Power, Majesty…we don’t tr

Lord, I don’t even have the words to say. Come Father! Make Your path clear. Let us rekindle our hearts to one another!... I’m caught somewhere in the middle . The past tugs and whispers and pleads…it is like a tempting mirage in the desert. The voice trembles with passion, “Remember when we had so much fun?” It pulls at my heart, my fleshly desires quake under the touch, my body weak, and my heart feels hollow. My mind is playing cruel games on me again, a game I try to win through perpetuating fantasies. The old is choking the new. If I surrender will I lose all control… Praise Him that I’m not where I was, that He brought me further than I ever thought I could or would dare to go. I thank Him that He is still pushing me further and further. I want Him to become so real to me that I can feel His breath on the back of my neck. I want to be quick to listen to Him and do His abundant will, to be slow to speak my desires to Him, and slow to become angry with Him when I don’t get my way (