A Story

Alright so I have to submit a work of fiction 10 pages or less, I assume double spaced, to the film school along with my application! I have time to work on this, but I have also been sort of freaking out about it as well. I usually can throw down 10 pages with little effort at all when really inspired, but as of late I have been going through an extremely dry spell. I know! I know! I just need to start writing everyday...there is a barely finished Christmas Story that could use some work, but I've felt depressed since I lost nearly five pages of it along with my lengthy testimony on that falty disk!...Anyway, I am highly digressing. I was mulling over this fact of writing this fiction piece in my head during my wedding/vacation (not my wedding) last week and I thought about a story entitled "A Story" that I wrote for my Psychonalis and Literature class in college. I really liked it, but I also know that I wrote it for a very specific purpose in mind. I just re-read it and I now see a lot wrong with it, but I still like it...I'm confusing myself and you.

One: It is rather short!
Two: I understand their are grammatical errors, those can be easily fixed!
Three: Some of the wording is repetitive and annoying in my opinion!
Four: I am very critical of my work!

So, needless to say this is where you come in. Can you help me out? What do you think of the story, should I try to flesh it out, make it a little more hearty, or should I scratch it completely and start with something new. If something new, do you guys have any good things to write about? With such a specific purpose I'm going to be completely impossible when it comes to the quality of this work. I know that this particular piece no matter if used or not is not something that I would turn in as is. While I have time, I would like to get started, so your complete honesty would be greatly appreciated. I plan to also send out an email concerning this hopefully this weekend. Thanks my blogging fam, you are an eternal source of strength and support and I can feel your prayers, I hope that you can feel mine...




~Kat said…
Want me to go through a preliminary edit for you? I can do it in Microsoft Word so you can see the changes I'm recommending. let me know and I'll do it tomorrow or this weekend.
Becca said…
wow. I read like the first paragraph and already you put me to shame. Well, I havent written in a while, and I have no inspiration. I cant write anything happy. It all comes out sickeningly depressing and evil. I guess its just not in my blood...
Anonymous said…
Hey, Babe!
Great narrative. The ending needs some tweaking. It ends almost too abruptly. The reader doesn't fully understand the magic parallel you are making. It is so in the vein of Angela Carter. Great Job! You will have to visit me when you come to school in NC. Love ya!
Holly said…
wow Melissa! You have great descriptive writing abilities! Amazing! I do agree that it does end quite quickly, but that may be your intention. Overall, very well written! You are in my prayers darlin'! :)
Gigi said…
Interesting.....very interesting.....I have nothing to offer but would love your analysis...it was intriguing and yet I have to agree it either ended too quickly or I got lost somewhere....and maybe you analysis would help me to know what I missed. I think myself discerning and intuitive and yet I think I missed part of it...but you DO have a way with words...
Gigi said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Melissa said…
Hello Everyone, sorry it has taken me so long to respond. I have been swamped. So, let me take a moment to respond to each of your comments. First, let me say thank you so much for your feedback.

First, Kat, my little amazing wizard when it comes to editing...I would LOVE for you to do a preliminary edit for me, just at your earliest convenience. That would be so very thoughtful and sweet of you. And I trust you completely!

Becca, blessing to my soul, thank you for your kind words...in my opinion everyone is a writer...so even if you are writing dark continue to write, I personally like a walk on the dark side, a little disturbing, feeds my soul in a strange way!

Erin, you rock! Chick I miss you so much it isn't even funny! Thank you for your honesty. You know I hadn't even been focusing on the ending that much, and I can totally see where you are coming from. Are you living in NC now??? I will make a trip especially for you!

Mustang Girl, thank you so much sweetheart, I think initially for the class I did have it end abrubtly, but now I want people to get lost in the work, make it seemless...I also want to change some of the description around a bit...we will see, I want to see what Kat does with it!

Becky, I will try to send you my analysis next week...I understand getting lost. I think I tried to use to much symbolism and didn't flesh the piece out enough...we will see. I've never actually gone back to work on a project again, it will be neat to actually see that writing is indeed re-writing!
Anonymous said…
Keep up the good work

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