With One Word!

I got on today to check my email and was completely and totally overwhelmed by all the lovely words that I found to describe me. I was filled with overflowing by every single one and I am thankful for the comments! I know that God has got His divine hand on me, and through each and everyone of you that are so precious and dear to my life He is able to show me a glimpse of His Kingdom. You all will never truly know just HOW much you mean to me. I don't deserve this incredible love, but I'm so thankful that I have it!

I have been thinking today at just how big God is, that He is so big that it is hard to even contain, I think that is why sometimes we have to check out for a moment, break away and run because it is all just to much to big, for when we get close enough to Him we see our true selves and realize that we really are lions and lionesses or future kings and queens...heirs to the throne with Him! I want so deeply to be like Marcia say in the midst of the flame, yet I'm terrified of that very thing...if I give my dreams to Him can I still be me like Barlow Girl says in their first album! I want HIM to be enough! There is SO much running through my head right now so please excuse the jumbled ramblings of this mad woman!

I need to thank everyone one of you who have lifted me up in prayer for my doctors visits...I just don't want to get nervous tomorrow! I just want to be calm and cool and trust God in it all! I KNOW that I KNOW I'm prayed up for this because of each and everyone of you. He is so good, He is so BIG, and I just want to be in the midst of what He is doing...I don't want to be about me, I want to be about Him! Oh I crave it, but run from it all at the same time!

We had a lovely weekend in Nashville! God taught me a lot....a whole lot! Through the big and small things He is there...He'll make the rain stop if only we ask Him too! My sister has got some options, just pray that God will guide her every step!

I've been listening to some awesome stuff. I got Rebecca St. James and Barlow Girl's new one and they are both AWESOME! Actually Barlow Girl does a song on Rebecca St. James album which I thought was very cool. Growing up in my teen years Rebecca was the woman, it was her, DC Talk, and Audio Adrenaline that really shaped me. I LOVED her so much, and I just found it really cool how my past and present were mixed within her album...because Barlow Girl definately speaks to a younger audience, but their words also resonate with me. I went to the In the Name of Love Tour with them, Starfield, David Nassar, and Mr. Agnew and they played never alone...in my teen years I was the one pushing my way to the front row, I couldn't get close enough to the stage...I went to every Christian rock concert I could get to, and I was always thinking of ways to get close to these individuals that I cared about! So, they started to play "Never Alone" and so I decided for my shere enjoyement I would go down front! This, ladies and gents was the first time that I realized I had really aged...I felt old amongst all these young ones...they all just kinda looked at me and I sorta creeped back to my seat! Alas, I still love Barlow Girl and have been rocking out to their music.

This leads me to my next rampage...I LOVE Christian music, always have, always will...I also love secular music, always have, probably always will! But, I've really been thinking about the relationship between Christian artist and fan...I won't go into great detail, but it has been due to some of my personal, good and bad, experiences with certain Christian musicians, some experiences my sisters have had, and some comments I have read that makes me really consider this...we are called to be set apart from this world, we are called all to be brother and sisters in Christ! Well, here is a thought what if we all started acting like the family we are. I know some Christian artists that I have to admit I would get star struck by...if Michael W. Smith or Steven Curtis Chapman walked out I might catch my breath, it is the same reason I'm afraid to go up to Michael Tait when my sisters and I see him in the theater in Nashville, its the same reason that if I ever met Sara Groves or Todd Agnew I might be completely afraid that I would screw everything up somehow...some way! In the end though we are called to be brothers and sisters...so here is what I'm thinking...what if we stopped looking at them as "celebrity" and in a way waiting to see how they might fall from the graces...the graces that we bestowed upon them, or exalting them up further than they should go, and hit our knees for them in fervent prayer! There task isn't easy by any means...I mean we are all called to serve, but can you imagine being up on stage have a million little uses staring back at them, Christians can be very intimidating, and striving not to fall to temptation from all the sins that daily combat our lives so that they won't look poorly in our eyes...and what if, just if they would maybe step down from the pedestals that we put them on or the glimmer of fame that they may or may not have been holding onto and get muddy with us...genuinely asking for prayer and seeking for that solace that only God can bring! I felt very clearly that I was meant to pray for Todd and the band while they were out on the Reflection of Something Tour! It just was something that I tried to do because I felt led to. The truth of the matter is that we are all human, and what marks us as different is the thumb print of Christ...if we start hitting our knees for these guys and honesty flows freely what could happen...what could the Christian industry do to change the world...I think it would be a fire unstopable! Because frankly I think in many ways Christian music has become to commercial, but we can show the world what a family is supposed....like DC Talk says..."we all wanna be loved, yeah!"

So, those are my crazy ramblings...I don't think I made much sense at all!

Love you all anyway!!!!


Bar Bar A said…
And we love you! I like your crazy ramblings!!!
Gayla said…
Just wanted to pop in since I've been AWOL for so long. Thinking about you and praying for you.

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