Bending...Thankful!
“Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns;
I am thankful thorns have roses.” – Alphonse Karr
“Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.” – Aesop
I miss the point. I look at the pain & not the beauty. I
don’t bend low to receive God’s blessings. I don’t partake in the banquet of
grace before me. I truly want others to know their worth, but I forget to know
mine.
Becoming less so He can become more is a hard etching on my
life map. It bleeds through the canvas into marrow. I am left scrapping &
scuffing against it. Seeing, perceiving two roads. Should I take the road less travelled?
After all I am made adventure – begging & pleading. I have waking dreams of
it. I am a woman with her head in the clouds. I see the world differently; a
kaleidoscope of providence that etches a story. The Storyteller sings our
stories. We all have, as Sara Groves says, purposes written on our hearts,
written on our souls.
I choose to add to the beauty. There are times when it is
not His beauty, but my own. I want to be praised & adored. I forget. I
forget the art of scrapping my knees on plank, bending low, feeling the heat of
sun on my weary back. I want to rest in the shadow of His wings.
I have a new job. I love my new job. I am thankful for this
opportunity to be His hands & His feet. But, change is hard. I feel small
& incapable. I feel self-focused. This new job, as beautiful a masterpiece
as it might be, has taught me where I am at in my journey. It isn’t all that
pretty, but I am aware. I am aware of this stirring, this grasping, hoping,
heart full, soul deep need to just fall into the mystery.
I am reflective this Thanksgiving. This year is quickly
approaching an end. I am anticipating ushering in the Advent Season. I am excited for a fresh start, a New Year,
to make better choices, to learn, grow, & discover new layers of faith.
I want to restore the luster, sweetness, & richness of
my walk with Christ.
So I am going to simply start here…with thanksgiving!
And they
sang responsively, praising and giving thanks to the Lord: “For He is good, For His mercy endures forever toward Israel.” Then
all the people shouted with a great shout, when they praised the Lord, because
the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid. –Ezra 3:11
What I love about this verse is the Israelites ‘sang
responsively’. The foundation of the house of the Lord was laid. And, so it is
when God lays His foundation in our own hearts. It is where He starts. Often a
wrecking ball is needed in several points along our reconstruction to get back
to that foundation. So I will let him demolition my efforts & sing
responsively when all I am left with is His sure foundation.
So I Give Thanks:
Monday night dinners with the Scalf’s - snuggles & hugs
& excitement in watching the Polar Express.
Baking: I lovingly mix ingredients to make something new
which, in turn, can be shared, a physical offering of my heart & love.
Little House on the Prairie - how God uses it to still speak
to my heart.
I am thankful for friends prayed for.
My old journal filled with past joys & sorrows brings
happiness & reflection.
Snow falling quietly hugging ancient trees in blankets white…how
everything becomes peace in snow
A person thankful for a bed
Books upon books
The movie Ever After & the joy it brings
A beautiful home
A simple life
Warm baths on cold nights
Family
Road trips
Old buildings haunted with history
Jesus, how I am thankful for you!
Sweet cashiers with warming smiles
Turkey & dressing
Dreams come true
The glorious firmament
The joy of warm soapy water on a dirty dish
Vacuum marks on a carpet
The heavenly aroma that come from my percolator when I make
coffee
Sunset/ Sunrise
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