Bending...Thankful!


“Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns; I am thankful thorns have roses.” – Alphonse Karr

“Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.” – Aesop

 The first quote delighted me. My eyes got wide & I giggled.

I miss the point. I look at the pain & not the beauty. I don’t bend low to receive God’s blessings. I don’t partake in the banquet of grace before me. I truly want others to know their worth, but I forget to know mine.

Becoming less so He can become more is a hard etching on my life map. It bleeds through the canvas into marrow. I am left scrapping & scuffing against it. Seeing, perceiving two roads. Should I take the road less travelled? After all I am made adventure – begging & pleading. I have waking dreams of it. I am a woman with her head in the clouds. I see the world differently; a kaleidoscope of providence that etches a story. The Storyteller sings our stories. We all have, as Sara Groves says, purposes written on our hearts, written on our souls.

I choose to add to the beauty. There are times when it is not His beauty, but my own. I want to be praised & adored. I forget. I forget the art of scrapping my knees on plank, bending low, feeling the heat of sun on my weary back. I want to rest in the shadow of His wings.

I have a new job. I love my new job. I am thankful for this opportunity to be His hands & His feet. But, change is hard. I feel small & incapable. I feel self-focused. This new job, as beautiful a masterpiece as it might be, has taught me where I am at in my journey. It isn’t all that pretty, but I am aware. I am aware of this stirring, this grasping, hoping, heart full, soul deep need to just fall into the mystery.

I am reflective this Thanksgiving. This year is quickly approaching an end. I am anticipating ushering in the Advent Season.  I am excited for a fresh start, a New Year, to make better choices, to learn, grow, & discover new layers of faith.

I want to restore the luster, sweetness, & richness of my walk with Christ.

So I am going to simply start here…with thanksgiving!

  And they sang responsively, praising and giving thanks to the Lord: “For He is good, For His mercy endures forever toward Israel.” Then all the people shouted with a great shout, when they praised the Lord, because the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid. –Ezra 3:11

What I love about this verse is the Israelites ‘sang responsively’. The foundation of the house of the Lord was laid. And, so it is when God lays His foundation in our own hearts. It is where He starts. Often a wrecking ball is needed in several points along our reconstruction to get back to that foundation. So I will let him demolition my efforts & sing responsively when all I am left with is His sure foundation.

So I Give Thanks:

Monday night dinners with the Scalf’s - snuggles & hugs & excitement in watching the Polar Express.

Baking: I lovingly mix ingredients to make something new which, in turn, can be shared, a physical offering of my heart & love.

Little House on the Prairie - how God uses it to still speak to my heart.

I am thankful for friends prayed for.

My old journal filled with past joys & sorrows brings happiness & reflection.

Snow falling quietly hugging ancient trees in blankets white…how everything becomes peace in snow

A person thankful for a bed

Books upon books

The movie Ever After & the joy it brings

A beautiful home

A simple life

Warm baths on cold nights

Family

Road trips

Old buildings haunted with history

Jesus, how I am thankful for you!

Sweet cashiers with warming smiles

Turkey & dressing

Dreams come true

The glorious firmament

The joy of warm soapy water on a dirty dish

Vacuum marks on a carpet

The heavenly aroma that come from my percolator when I make coffee

Sunset/ Sunrise

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