Loss Made Full
“He will swallow up
death forever. The Sovereign Lord will wipe away the tears from all faces; he
will remove the disgrace of his people from all the earth. The Lord has
spoken.” – Isaiah 25:8
The room dark, ushered sacred
serenity – pregnant with quiet exquisiteness…
I had met
the woman lying in bed while she filled empty cups of broken souls. She was
like a woman at a well pouring life into earthen vessels. Otherworldly, she
spoke soft, a dignified cadence upon her lips. In my more than three years at the
Hope Lodge I had not met an individual quite like her. She was dying. Yet, she
held no resentment, no bitter anger. I watched her give comfort to those who
came to offer theirs. Her soft voice singing, “It’s okay. It will be okay.”
I’ll be honest, I wanted to curl up in bed with her, tuck my head in the cleft
of her chin, wrap my arms around her and sing – sing songs of worship in
Jesus’s blood, amazing grace, heaven, and victory.
Our sweet
Patient Navigator, Melanie, anointed her with oil (not actual oil, but words of
affirmation, joy, and the promise of dancing with Jesus); she covered her with
merciful touches. The three of us came to tell her what an inerasable person
she was. Her life had touched more for the glory of the Lord than she would
ever know. My heart filled with the
promises God asks us to cleave too.
“You will lose someone you can’t live
without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you
never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news.
They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come
through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly – that still
hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.” – Anne
Lamott
“Praise be to God and Father of our
Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who
comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble
with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings
of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort
overflows.” – 2 Corinthians 1: 3-5
I heard his
assured voice on the other line. As I spoke with him and his wife I knew they
brought with them a current of grace. They would inevitably affect the tide of
our Hope Lodge for the positive over the six weeks they were with us. They came
to serve, and spoke words of affirmation to any and every one they came in
contact with.
Charles is a
dignified man. He carries himself with respect and assured fluidity. Well
dressed in clothing and in spirit…
Charles and
Mavis came back to the Lodge on Wednesday June 10th with many of the
guests who stayed with them. They provided an amazing lunch and dinner for our
current guests, wonderful entertainment, and gave us a large monetary donation.
All of this was extremely humbling, yet, the largest reward was hearing all the
guests that had played a hand in this event share their experiences and
gratitude.
The cancer
had taken its toll on Charles. He was a shadow of his former self. His body was
weak, but his spirit was strong.
I walked over
to him and grabbed his hands; tears dripped down both of our faces. “I want you
to know that I love you Charles. You have meant so much to me. You have
impacted my life in ways I cannot fully explain,” my voice trembled as I spoke.
He kissed me on the cheek, told me he loved me, and we parted ways that night…
“The darker the night, the brighter
the stars, the deeper the grief, the closer is God!” – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and
my deliverer, my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the
horn of my salvation, my stronghold.” – Psalm 18:2
I don’t know
what happens after the last feathered breath is taken? What it feels like to
slip from this world into the unseen? Yet, I know that to be absent from this
body is to present with our sweet Lord. I know this is a very good thing. There
is peace in trusting that the one who conquered the grave has gone before us.
Yet, to find fullness in Him amidst great tragedy is hard. It leaves one with
an urgency to speak love at the very moment it is felt, ask to sit at one’s
table again and again, bring others close to our campfire, and understand that
relationship – even if your heart is torn asunder – is a rich gift.
“Weeping may remain for the night, but
rejoicing comes in the morning.” – Psalm 30:5
Love never gives up, never loses
faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. – 1
Corinthians 13:7
Though he brings grief, he also shows
compassion because of the greatness of his unfailing love. – Lamentations 3:32
NLT
And now here is my secret, a very
simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is
essential is invisible to the eye! – Antoine de Saint-Exupery; The Little
Prince
A precious
friend and I talked about the tangible reality of dragons and as Christ
followers our purpose to aid in healing. She prayed, “help us be ready to rub
the sweet salve of your grace into the unscaled”. The ‘sweet salve of grace’ –
may we carry this fragrant balm to every life we touch.
“Only people who are capable of
loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving
serves to counteract their grief and heals them.” – Leo Tolstoy
God is most glorified in us when we
are most satisfied in Him. – John Piper
May the God of peace, who through the
blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that
great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will,
and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be
glory forever and ever. Amen.
– Hebrews 13: 20-21
Comments